A Baby Changes Everything

As we enjoy our Christmas presents and family today we should stop and remember why we are celebrating this day. Close your eyes and imagine a young girl who is engaged to be married being visited by an angel to tell her that she is to be with child, the Christ child. She is alarmed, for she hasn't been with a man and Joseph would surely put her away for good. I'm sure she cried because, you see, a baby changes everything. If you have ever been with child, you understand what she must be feeling. It was that baby that was born on Christmas that CHANGED the WORLD FOREVER. It's that babe in the manger that we worship, for he came so that we could be changed forever. He came to this earth, not in a palace or for all the world to see, but in a barn with a bunch of animals. That baby would grow up to die on the cross one day, on the day we celebrate his resurrection or Easter. I know that today has a new meaning to me more than ever this year. Oh, we are all guilty of being caught up in traditions, presents, and family; all I ask is that you stop and think...remember who came to Earth on this day. Don't stay in the "Grinch, bah humbug mode" all day. Don't think this is "your day" but instead remember what BABY CHANGED THE WORLD. MERRY CHRISTMAS!

So LIVE

Words fly my way, stabbing me to the core
Should I take them to heart?
Should I really care?
I care too much and that's why I bleed...
Words flying at me, like arrows in the wind
You don't understand what they do to me
You don't comprehend where they hit,
Where they push me off the edge...
How can you? You aren't who I am.
I don't blame you at all...
I think I used to blame you all,
Then I realized this...
I have a choice to LIVE, really live.

Terrors in my soul, telling me who I should be
I tell them to go away, leave me alone
I know I'm not crazy, no matter what you say
I just know that I have to STAND for who I am
I don't have to apologize for who I am
You need to SEE ME...see the real me
If you don't, you will never stop throwing darts
Killing my inner soul, because that's me.

So, I stand here in the cold, not knowing what to say
I stand here in the night, eyes burning in the wind
I slowly understand that it can't be you anymore
You can't live for me anymore....
So, I shake my fist at the fleeting air and say,
It's me.......SO LIVE!


*The above post is a declaration of freedom, freedom from the words and accusations of others. You see, we so often live our life the way other people want us to live instead of the way God and the Bible want us to live. We are like a puppet on a string, dancing here and there never really living a life of our own. God gave us free will, but the average person has no concept of that very thing...free will. Most often we go through life living the way we perceive others would have us to live. How do I know this? Because I grew up this way and watched many many people live that very way. Then there were the few who knew that that wasn't for them, and they were brave enough to be themselves. We often looked at them as rebels in the youth group, but the truth of the matter was, we were scared because they weren't going "our direction." My question is what is "our direction"? Why is it that we have to have a model and then pattern our lives after that one pattern of living? I realize that Jesus is the ultimate pattern, but I do know that he gave us free will. Yes, we are to be like HIM, but everyone thinks it's their way. I say, search your heart, read your Bible, and ask for the Holy Spirit's leading. He will show you how to live. I have lived way too long caring what others think of me, and it's about time I break FREE from "that mold" whatever that mold is. Man looks on the outward appearance, but God looks at the heart. Stop judging people for what they look like or what they do. LOVE is the key to any relationship. LOVE is the key to bringing people to you as a friend. When you decide to stop caring about the questions and accusing eyes, then you know it's not all about you anymore....you start to know that these people are broken and they too want to be free. They just don't know how to break away from approval addiction. I don't follow man; I follow GOD. He is my ultimate teacher and guide. Just food for thought.

Tears

The tears flow freely down my face,

Tears of pain, tears of hurt, tears of happiness

How can I choose which emotion with which to display

But to freely cry, whether hard or soft

God gave me a friend when I felt alone

I feel pain, I feel sorrow, but not on my own.

How do I describe this overwhelming well?

I close my eyes, and they flow freely o'er my face

Down to the floor...I am the only one who cares

Who understands the meaning behind my tears.

Don't mock for tears are the cleansing of the inner soul.

Try, Try Again

So, some people may say that they don't have a hard time losing weight or exercising. I used to be one of those people, in another life-time, or so it seems! But last night I was watching Discovery Health, and they were doing a gastric bi-pass on a 17 year old boy who was over 400 pounds! His sister had been over 300, and it took her almost two years to get down to her normal weight which she did with diet and exercise. I just felt badly for the young man because he desperately wanted to be seen for who he was not what he looked like. Unfortunately, society has taught us that looks are everything. I guarantee that when I get down to where I am supposed to weigh, people who never talked to me before will start coming up to me! Why is that? It's sad, but that's really not what my blog is about. A dear friend of mine asked me how I was losing weight because she has no self control. I laughed and said, my secret to this weight loss journey that I am on, is when I fall, I get back up. I just try, try again! Man, I've lost 16 pounds since September, and I really hope to lose another 10 by the NEW YEAR. I could have lost more, but you know what, I can't look back! I have to keep going forward! And all I am really doing is trying to be healthy! Yes, I count points because I have no knowledge of portions at the moment, but I think that will come with time. Yes, with time, I won't need to count everything I eat; I will just know when enough is enough. For now, I get up, dust off myself, and try, try again. That's all I can do! I know that by this time next year, I will be a whole new person, and it will be my goal to help those who want it because no one should be miserable!

You're a Mean One, Mr. Grinch!

What a season this has been! I have to say that people are meaner and grumpier this year. Maybe it's because of the economy, but I've noticed in my store that customers just want to be left alone. It's my job to relay the sales of the day and to see if the customer needs or wants help, and lately, most of them have been curt with the reply, "I'm just looking, thank you." This doesn't make my job any easier, but I always felt that if someone wants to be left alone, then I will leave them alone. At least I have tried to be of a help and will be there if they decide they need my help. Last week, a lady came in to return something. I recognized her name immediately as the lady who buys alot of clothes and then returns over half of them! She is a demanding type of woman, and I could tell that my assistant manager wanted to scream. (not that I blamed her in the least! LOL!) I immediately tried to get every one's attention off of the return and asked the lady if she was going on a cruise. ( her "excuse" for returning the blouse was that she was packing and realized she had too many dress-up tops! LOL! I was laughing inwardly!) She said she wasn't, but was going on a trip to Puerto Rico. That opened a whole new door, and soon the return was done with everyone not being frustrated anymore! All of this to say, I think I learned something that evening. People, no matter how demanding or mean, have something to talk about, something that will interest them. All we have to do is listen. So, as frustrating as people become this time of year, I am going to try and work on that one thing....listening. I have been able to help diffuse many a disagreement either between co-workers or customers this season. Whether it be my sense of humor or soft tone, it's been worth it. I am in no way a perfect "people person" but I am beginning to learn how to deal with all sorts of personalities.

Dear Joshua,

My dearest husband, there once was a time 7 years ago when all I had was you. Now, two more people have come into my heart that I love beyond words, Charity and JW. That in turn, is unfair to you because somehow along the way, I may have forgotten what it was like to just be me and you. Maybe it's this time of year that brings reality back to earth, or maybe it's because this time 7 years ago, we were just realizing how much we loved each other. It could be because now, I am realizing how much time really flies, and I can't believe that this December 27, it will be 7 years since you asked me at the BWI airport to be your wife. Whatever the case may be, I know that I am a nostalgic kind of girl, and I like to remember when things began and how they made me feel. I have to say for certain, we have been through alot together over the past 8 years of our lives, and I wouldn't trade being with you for anyone else in the whole world. I wouldn't trade all of our heartache and tears, as painful as they may be, for anything because that is what brought us closer. I have to say that if I had to do all over again, I'd still choose you because you are the kind of man I always used to dreamed about: loving, kind, awesome father, full of humor, a true gentleman, a HUGE heart, etc. Whether it be your sweet eyes that melted my heart on our very first date, or the way you talked non-stop on our second and third date, I knew that I would marry you from the first time I talked to you. I just knew that we had so much in common, and not only that, you completed me in every way. Where I am shy, you are bold; when I am unsure, you know for sure with all of your heart. When I can't seem to smile, you are full of laughter and sunshine. When all I want to do is do nothing, you are so full of ideas for fun and memories. You still have so many dreams, and I know they will all come true because you are the type of man that doesn't just talk, you also DO. I love you, dear Joshua, and I plan on loving you for the rest of my life. All my LOVE, Elizabeth