tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-29725602593845126352024-03-14T05:12:00.168-04:00Random ThoughtsA blog to follow, full of funny and serious daily writings of my life.Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.comBlogger132125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-21521273943600352162014-01-20T11:50:00.000-05:002014-01-20T12:05:01.285-05:00Standing in the Shadow-lands<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Yes, it's true, I grew up in a pretty good home. My earliest memories are mornings with my daddy in our little kitchen. He would be sitting at the kitchen table, and I would have my little dish rag drying the breakfast dishes. My mom was the only one who worked during those days as my dad stayed home with me. He was having a hard time finding a job, and I know he felt badly. Yet, I would never trade those days with him because those memories are precious. I remember he was a <em>deep</em> person even as I have become to this day. Me and my father are alike in many ways except for the very fact that I have always cared what others thought of me and what I had to say. It was like I was holding back within the shadows of whatever it was that I had built at a very young age. </span><br />
<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: Verdana;"> Looking in the mirror, I am very proud of my heritage and I would like very much to rise up and speak to the world and tell them exactly who I am. It's not really for them to know, but a sort of exercise for my own sake, to show myself that it's ok to step into the light and speak out for what I believe. I have no problem telling those closest to me how I am feeling. Sometimes I do go too far with my unsought advice, but those who know me, know that it comes from a heart of love and care. I would never intentionally hurt others as I have been hurt through the years.</span><br />
<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: Verdana;"> My earliest memories of being told that I was too out-spoken was when I was only 4 years old! I remember standing up to an adult telling them they shouldn't talk that way to a little girl. The adult looked at me like I had 4 heads and told me to live up to the expectations of my father being in a position at church. I then remember throughout the years standing up for those who were underprivileged, and then there came a point where what I had to say didn't really matter anymore. I was told that I had to come from a bad home or experience something horrific to really matter. I remember trying to be heard, and I would do ridiculous things trying to be noticed.</span><br />
<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: Verdana;"> The adults in my life wouldn't believe that I was behind the ridiculous stunts but would blame others around me. That was a huge disappointment to me because I wanted to heard even if it was in a negative light. I realize that sounds twisted to some degree, but looking back, I just see a girl who wanted her voice to be heard. There came a point where I stopped trying to be seen and heard, and I retreated within myself keeping most of what I thought and felt buried deeply inside my being. I even chose what I wanted to do in my life because I thought it would make all of those around me happy. I fully didn't make a decision based on who I really was, but God knew what was happening as I delved into the world of obtaining a degree in secondary education majoring in English and music. Those were my passions, and to this day, music screams when words aren't enough and words are just my life as I pursue my writing career. </span><br />
<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: Verdana;"> To some, I am perceived as a quiet, meek girl and to others, I can be seen as sweet and innocent and easily run over....but I would like to tell you who I am inside:</span><br />
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<span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;"><em>When the tears run down your face</em></span></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I can feel the pain that dwells inside</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Sometimes I hold back</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">But all I want to do is hold your hand</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I want to grab the pain that caused your tears</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">And throw it out into the universe...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">When injustice is served, I want to be your defender</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Because you may not have a voice</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">But I can prove you don't deserve hate...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">When you sit in silence</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I want to scream, I know what you are feeling</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Because it's where I once lived</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Stiff and afraid of being who I really am...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">When you say I am living a lie</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I want to scream, "Then do you really know me?"</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I may not walk the road you wish for me</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I may not live up to your expectations</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">But I know love....</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Love for mankind, love for creation, love for the universe...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I am an advocate, a servant, a healer of broken hearts</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">My drive in life is to break the very fears that once threatened </span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">To break my soul</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Not only within me but in my children and others who walk</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Where I once walked....</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I am driven to speak truth where fear is present</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">And show others that perfect LOVE casts out fear...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Any fear you may possess</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Any voice that screams it's not worth it,</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">I will whisper into the darkness</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">That it's really ok...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">The bondage and chains that have bogged you down</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Afraid of showing your heart</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Afraid of following your passions</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Afraid of falling in love</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Afraid of trusting again</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Afraid of life....</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">There is only one way for it all to fall away</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">To shatter into a thousand pieces.</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Speak what you are afraid of the most</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">But don't say you are afraid</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">Scream what you are hiding</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;">But don't continue to hide within the shadows.....</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="color: #38761d; font-family: Verdana;"><br /></span></em></div>
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<span style="color: #274e13; font-family: Verdana;"> So, I tell you with an open heart that it's ok to tell the world that you care. It's ok to stand up for those who can't stand up for themselves. It's ok to care about someone even if they shove you away. It's ok to tell someone what they are saying to you is heard but not accepted. You don't have to take abuse of any kind. You don't have to live in fear of who you really are. You can be who you want to be. You can influence so many by just speaking out. In a day and age where bullying runs rampant in the schools and even in the workplace, it's ok to say something. Don't be afraid of somebody and how they present themselves. Don't be afraid to tell someone that what is being done is wrong; don't be afraid to set boundaries and stick to your guns. Don't be afraid to fall in love. Don't be afraid to trust again even if you have been hurt by a multitude of people. I have been there. I have experienced bullying all through school and in work places. I rarely stood up for myself. I allowed it to happen and retreated deep within myself. I saw my sister stand up for herself and others and she was perceived as a rebel who couldn't shut up. I see her as brave and unafraid to be who she was. Looking back, I should've protected her better. I should never have allowed what happened to her happen. To the people who thought they were fulfilling God's plan, you are wrong! You were bullies! You thought you could bully your way through my family! I am not angry at you, but I am now aware of who you really were. I can now turn away and step out of the shadows and be who I really am, be who I once was at the age of 4 standing up for that little girl.</span></div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-39984297421269010902014-01-17T18:48:00.000-05:002014-01-17T18:48:10.844-05:00The Heart's Woven Web<br />
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Sometimes there are no words to speak </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I can see your tear-drops fall </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Like rain in the mellow mist </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I can feel your heart as it beats </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I can see your smile paint the northern sky </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I can reach out and touch your trembling hand</span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I can see within the
shadows on the wall </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And know that peace fills your entire being </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And the moondrops that dance around your bed </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Paint a picture of light and warmth </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I can listen to the falling leaves and the whistling wind </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And still hear the faintest cry uttered from your lips </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">To know that you are feeling </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">To see that you need human touch </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">To understand when in the quiet of tomorrow </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">You can rest and find the answers searched </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">To reconcile within the recesses of your inner soul </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And know that there is always a brighter tomorrow </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Laughter combined with the faintest tint of wine </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Runs over like a river of happiness </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And sets your soul free to listen and observe....</span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>All of this because your
soul is knit like a spider's web </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">With strands of silk so tightly woven </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And strengthens with the hands of time. </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Hands clasping hands, hearts touching hearts</span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>Forever in the reality of
the unknown </span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="color: #333333; font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And yet able to withstand the harshest of winter's chilly wind</span></i><span style="color: #333333;"><span style="font-family: Calibri;">.</span></span></div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-61753486316994788302014-01-02T18:38:00.000-05:002014-01-02T18:38:57.143-05:00Finding My Voice<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgstjoalvpoy169EVlHSXqmJZ55I-lrXhUtQUEBl6EfIMb1r-ro8CoNa0fxw3ZY4EpSXI5KBo-D_v2ur3rnKYWLN8qoNt_69O3yudTJb1KC2wVxuAYAlTo9jHuYO7gNi2mlE4AQm8WgexVG/s1600/hope.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgstjoalvpoy169EVlHSXqmJZ55I-lrXhUtQUEBl6EfIMb1r-ro8CoNa0fxw3ZY4EpSXI5KBo-D_v2ur3rnKYWLN8qoNt_69O3yudTJb1KC2wVxuAYAlTo9jHuYO7gNi2mlE4AQm8WgexVG/s320/hope.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">Somewhere amidst the vastness of your embrace</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana;">I lost what was truly mine</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana;">For years, I have been a wandering gnome</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Lost within the sea of emerald green</span></div>
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<span style="font-family: Verdana;">But it really felt like smothering, hot sand</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Threatening to choke the very life out of me</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">A clone identical to all of the others</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Thinking, dreaming, appearing, walking, talking</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Appearances seem to be everything in that world</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Not many took the time to find reality</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Digging deep under the massive structure</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Walls made of iron and stone, unbreakable</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Robotic, uncensored, yet programmed all the same</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">I was too afraid to find my way</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Out of the tangled vines and smoldering jungle</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Steam rose whenever I stepped forward</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Taking my very breath away</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Making it hard to breathe</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Adrenaline pumping through my veins, heart pounding</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">The end was very near, or so I was made to think</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">When all else failed, I was frozen in place</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Pressured into this being who wasn't really me...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Now, I stand, alone, and very still</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">The dust seems to be clearing</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">And for the first time,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">I am beginning to see my way to the mirror</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">My reflection is like deja vu</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">It seems familiar, as if to be my very friend</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Somehow, I always knew who I was</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Deep inside, buried for so long</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">This person, born a steady girl with outspokenness</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Ready to face the world</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Able to take what came her way</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">This girl I see in the glass</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Truly who I've always been and am now finding...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">My friend, confidant, missing puzzle piece</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">A voice, strong and clear</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">No misunderstandings from what came from her mouth</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Confident in what she wanted, and ready to take it</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">A tender heart, yet able to set healthy boundaries</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">This is me, finding my voice</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">And hearing it loud and clear, head held high...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">I can't hide or be what you want me to be</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">But I can listen and hear what you are saying.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">I won't judge you or twist you to make you into someone else</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">Because in so doing so, I will have become</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;">What once threatened to choke the life out of me.</span></div>
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Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-73651592819258442382013-12-07T01:28:00.001-05:002013-12-07T01:28:07.137-05:00Frozen<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigupWyBZlyVvIcCZ9Cj6pOcWvmASylrNjeFZLLqMtvIR5z2R1aXL1PgmPKrm1SG_V3AK2cDFfe71_2wrcVRIMc-lQmTNP5lhyphenhyphen-OazfECsESQ4N62BG6gnSdxr0Iv41ngpviHfprH-xgaZJ/s1600/frozen.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEigupWyBZlyVvIcCZ9Cj6pOcWvmASylrNjeFZLLqMtvIR5z2R1aXL1PgmPKrm1SG_V3AK2cDFfe71_2wrcVRIMc-lQmTNP5lhyphenhyphen-OazfECsESQ4N62BG6gnSdxr0Iv41ngpviHfprH-xgaZJ/s320/frozen.jpg" /></a></div><div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Courier New", Courier, monospace;">Looking straight ahead, motionless, blinking slightly</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;"> Not caring which way's up or down, or even if the line is straight</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">All that matters is the beating of my heart...</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">To remind me that I'm a living being, warm-blooded</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">Emotions, some too deep to register,</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">The pain, stuffed down into a canister...</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">It's not worth the discussion or anxiety it brings, </span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">For, honestly, not too many take the time to listen</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">Not too many really are there to wash it away.</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">The promises, empty words, fall on deaf ears</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">And make one realize that words are just that...</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">Words that are hollow and empty and have no meaning</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">The empty, "I love you's," and the repeats that sting...</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">Others seeing your selfishness and berating your humanity</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">Telling you what they see, feel and hear...</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">You see yourself in a whole new light,</span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Courier New;">Yet, now the coast is clear to just walk away....frozen.</span></div>
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</div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-18154553898105230852013-11-27T09:33:00.000-05:002013-11-27T09:33:01.849-05:00The Day I Met You<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0mW3bGIcX-PcgbTs8KG1OdEe882WqlmlHXCTFhI7-jlEiT8TtX6_Lr7M968iHvePeLPMHz85-wyNGoN9nvtNpFQJ6kfb8gkSiBb1kLwOAe_QvYMO7G-BijrcYdrsiZAQxZg9lS4bGx4kh/s1600/angeloflight.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj0mW3bGIcX-PcgbTs8KG1OdEe882WqlmlHXCTFhI7-jlEiT8TtX6_Lr7M968iHvePeLPMHz85-wyNGoN9nvtNpFQJ6kfb8gkSiBb1kLwOAe_QvYMO7G-BijrcYdrsiZAQxZg9lS4bGx4kh/s320/angeloflight.jpg" /></a></div> The following is a poem that will be in my novel that I am currently writing. I thoroughly enjoyed writing it, and I thought that it would be nice to share it now. My novel is historical fiction written during the Civil War era and speaks highly of both sides of our country, the division, the brokenness, the togetherness and the love that still remained. I hope you all have a blessed Thanksgiving holiday!<br />
<br />
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**********************</div>
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<b style="mso-bidi-font-weight: normal;"><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">When I First Saw You<o:p></o:p></span></i></b></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
never dreamed that I would fall asleep<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">That
my sleep would be the sleep of angels<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Carrying
me away to a place unknown<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Where
the waters are crystal clear<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And
the grass is an emerald green<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">They
carried me away<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And
I felt it was a dream,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">The
kind of dream where <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
never want to wake up<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Nor
do I ever want it to end….<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
felt free and liberated<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And
for a little while<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
knew that I had forgotten all that <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Still
lived down on Earth<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">All
that was a great part of my life<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">A
giant part of my soul<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
lived in this fantasy land where nothing went wrong<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And
everything flowed perfectly<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">The
flowers bloomed and their fragrance, so sweet<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">The
song of the birds joined the melody of the angelic choir<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
fell asleep and I never wanted for it to end….<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
felt no pain, and I felt no sadness<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">No
tears came to my eyes<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And
no sorrow resided within my heart<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
only felt the joy that resonated<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">From
what was all around me<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">The
tranquility, the peace<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">The
love and bright light of hope….<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">The
angels took me away<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">They
brought me through a bright light<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Into
this mysterious land<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Everyone
was smiling<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">No
one was sad<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Sadness
never existed here…..<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
don’t know how long I was gone….<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
don’t know how long I lingered here, in this place<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
could’ve stayed here forever<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
could’ve never gone back<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
would’ve forgotten all those that loved me<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Down
here on Earth<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Their
memories would be but a dream <o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
once shared<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">A
blissful part of a past memory<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
know I would only feel a happiness not my own<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">A
tranquility that I can’t describe…..<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Then,
I woke up to reality<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">The
pain hit me like a ton of bricks<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Shooting
to every recess of my broken body<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And
torn heart within my chest<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">For
a few moments,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
couldn’t breathe without the pain being unbearable<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">My
swollen eyes struggled to open<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
wiggled my fingers and toes<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<div align="center">
</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
remembered everything<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And
pieces of nothing<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Dense
fog came and went in waves<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
was as if a dying man<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Buried
in a sea of chained memories<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">A
wagon-full of what reality really was….<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Then,
I opened my eyes<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">At
first, I thought I was dreaming<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">For
I saw your face<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">More
beautiful than anything I could imagine<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">An
angel dressed in white…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Where
was I?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">What
was happening?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">What
was real and what was a dream?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
felt pain, far greater than anything I could have dreamed<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Yet,
you stood there, watching over me<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Tenderly
caring for my broken body<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
think I don’t want to wake up<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
think if this is real<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span>I want it to last forever<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">This
time, I remember everything<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">This
time, I feel pain and sorrow<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">But
I also feel something else<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Today,
I met you, my angel in disguise<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">And
I don’t ever want to let you go….<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></i></div>
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</div>
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<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="mso-spacerun: yes;"> </span><o:p></o:p></i></span></div>
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Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-52466441450050059412013-11-19T23:05:00.001-05:002013-11-19T23:05:16.620-05:00Dark Your Path May Appear...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhe0E_PrQkwVmehlUxf4Xof3J9jqMJRH_Jx0Sx4aTXFhxEf_BhTtNqJoJ3Kq3m-BdB7EbvAazNQBuBQJqDE7aDj1AjaASsNZzNtQg0_kvw0Up-k5eWZjTQQNQLx9K-b6JIZPcbOMOeZf7T/s1600/foggyday.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjhe0E_PrQkwVmehlUxf4Xof3J9jqMJRH_Jx0Sx4aTXFhxEf_BhTtNqJoJ3Kq3m-BdB7EbvAazNQBuBQJqDE7aDj1AjaASsNZzNtQg0_kvw0Up-k5eWZjTQQNQLx9K-b6JIZPcbOMOeZf7T/s320/foggyday.jpg" /></a></div>
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<em></em> </div>
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<em>The way you close your eyes and think when you open them</em></div>
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<em>Everything will have been just a long bad dream...</em></div>
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<em>The way you choke back any tears that may surface</em></div>
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<em>Because to cry in front of others is to make yourself a little less,</em></div>
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<em>Or so you think...</em></div>
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<em>The way you feel as if you are all alone in this world</em></div>
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<em>Even if there is always someone there to say, "I love you..."</em></div>
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<em>The way you walk into an empty house and just wish that for once</em></div>
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<em>Just one time, the floor would open and swallow you whole....</em></div>
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<em>The way you listen to those around you and you hear what they have to say</em></div>
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<em>But it just seems to vanish into the night, like fleeting wisps of air...</em></div>
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<em>The way it hurts to smile anymore because you know you are empty</em></div>
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<em>There is something missing</em></div>
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<em>There is something that isn't right</em></div>
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<em>You have everyone</em></div>
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<em>Yet have no one</em></div>
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<em>Any words of comfort burn holes into your skin</em></div>
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<em>Melting you into total nothingness</em></div>
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<em>Making you feel like the monster you have learned to hate....</em></div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCWF3M9vhngoRCXWk07xoHuMEMCKPjcjm_h9ZBFyDp-B1hKpvMid37hc7gXJuoR556xVFQiE_M6DYlpn4ebsaCrHBm_SNfRPkuVG11-Q23grvlGYlpsztXrY_Pdf3qENfKQeh9ARyQM9B_/s1600/rainbowalley.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhCWF3M9vhngoRCXWk07xoHuMEMCKPjcjm_h9ZBFyDp-B1hKpvMid37hc7gXJuoR556xVFQiE_M6DYlpn4ebsaCrHBm_SNfRPkuVG11-Q23grvlGYlpsztXrY_Pdf3qENfKQeh9ARyQM9B_/s320/rainbowalley.jpg" /></a></div>
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The last couple of weeks have been a trying and testing time in my life. I am happy to say that things are starting to look up for me. I had some trying times throughout several parts of my life between learning more about myself and how I respond to certain situations. One thing that remains true is knowing if the same thing happens over and over again in ones' life, it probably stands to note that a certain lesson has not been learned in that given situation. If the lesson had been learned, so much turmoil wouldn't be felt over and over, but instead, we would be able to brush it off and move on with our life. </div>
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For years, I have felt totally misunderstood, and I would become terribly frustrated with that knowledge. It was like whatever I did, someone had to question me as if I was a moron or had never really lived on this planet, Earth. More and more every day, I am beginning to not only understand myself but also am beginning to be okay with who I am. People still scratch their heads at me, but it really doesn't matter, because why I did something cannot always be answered, even by me. </div>
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I refuse to become jaded from experiences and trials that have crossed my path. I refuse to give up on the dreams and goals that I have set for myself. I set my standards ridiculously high, in many people's minds, but the truth of the matter is, what is the definition of "ridiculously high?" Is it really absurd to dream a dream? Is it also absurd to dare reach beyond the stars? I think not. </div>
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For example: when I was a Senior in high school, I set a goal to become the valedictorian, and I accomplished that goal. Who cares if my Senior class was small...what matters is that it was reached. I also continued to tell everyone that I would go to college and graduate with my Bachelor's in English and music....once again, those goals were met. I also said that I would meet and marry the man of my dreams and be married by August 2003. I remember the laughter and comments and the rolling of eyes...."Oh, Elizabeth! You can't possibly know that or predict the future!" "Oh, Elizabeth, you have a great sense of humor!" I would become miffed because I really believed in my dreams becoming a reality, and they did. I said that I would have the perfect family: one girl and one boy. I have both. I am not a fortune teller. I cannot predict the future.</div>
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The thing is this: all of those things happened and then....NOTHING!!!!!!!!!!! All of that happened and no more goals were set. It was as if my life was over...oh, it wasn't over per say, but what else? I became stagnant....I became depressed. I became lost....I was sinking and there was nobody around to help me back up. I was desperately floating and living each and every day like a lifeless robot. There was not one single person who truly tried to help me out of it. I will say this though....my husband did try and he was at a loss of what to do. We actually both were struggling in our lives. We both were lost. We were alone. </div>
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Then God graciously began to open my eyes little by little, and it was through a really good friend of mine that I began to see life a little differently. I began to stop pointing my fingers at everyone around me and instead, I began to look in the mirror. I didn't see anyone but just ME. You see, my spirit has been broken into a million pieces by different things that have happened throughout my life, but God has been healing me piece by piece. Every day, I choose to forgive. Every single day, I choose to stop and not become angry at the drop of a hat. Every day I am practicing to see others as Christ would see them. I am tested and tried every single minute of every day. I don't have to always be right. I also have nothing to prove to anyone. I am a Christian, and I do not live with condemnation. </div>
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For years, I lived in a world where God was the "BIG MEANY" up there in Heaven, and I must mind my "p's and q's." Now, I live each and every day of my life knowing that He loves me and forgave me the minute I trusted in Him. My path is no longer dark. I have set a few new goals, and my life is moving forward. Life is good, and I give all of the credit to Him.</div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-74181450499923554372013-10-31T21:15:00.000-04:002013-10-31T21:15:07.271-04:00Trick of Treat?<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHWrf0HvUhv7pHUiDN3vZKiK0NRxnCV0VYClFO6noaOOayyplg9b0ZKpIEq8jW6i7EcfGaX3cnDvYqqewW96qqZK2tH7KNxAx1o9tlwE1NUahDWGszww2yTLhYjx4iUb-MnfEfmAYFDLdt/s1600/its-the-great-pumpkin-charlie-brown-1-e1349807858537.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhHWrf0HvUhv7pHUiDN3vZKiK0NRxnCV0VYClFO6noaOOayyplg9b0ZKpIEq8jW6i7EcfGaX3cnDvYqqewW96qqZK2tH7KNxAx1o9tlwE1NUahDWGszww2yTLhYjx4iUb-MnfEfmAYFDLdt/s320/its-the-great-pumpkin-charlie-brown-1-e1349807858537.jpg" /></a></div>
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<span style="color: #b45f06;"> I grew up in a world where trick or treating just wasn't done. I'm not tearing down my upbringing by any means. In fact, I applaud my parents for raising me the best they knew how. As it is, parenting is trial and error. I have memories of my dad handing out king sized candy bars to the kids in our neighborhood, and I also have memories of parents being scared where they took their kids because crazy people were starting to add needles and poison to candy. I remember the uproar even though that was years ago. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #b45f06;"> In today's society, I think that parents are more careful, or so it seems. Of course, there are still crazy people in this world, but I also don't think that we have to worry as much. The truth of the matter is simple: Halloween is so controversial in the "Christian" world. There are arguments that go both ways, and I can see both sides of it. But to me, it's simple....Halloween depicts a fun time to spend with your children and family. It's fun for them to dress up in their favorite character and go door to door (or trunk to trunk) and say, "Trick or treat!" and get free candy!</span></div>
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<span style="color: #b45f06;"> I think that everyone has a right to their opinion, but here it is: opinions are like arm-pits...they often stink. If no one asked your opinion, why put it out there? I know that I will be ridiculed by what I believe, but here it is again: why do we have to be so mean and tell people our opinions on things that are none of our business? Why is it that we just can't keep our mouths shut and smile? What would Jesus really do? Would he stand up and reprimand us for going trick or treating? Oh, well, you say, "But it's a devil's holiday!!!!" I beg to differ. In fact, during my lunch break today, I researched the origin of Halloween, and in fact, it was thought to be created by the festival of Samhain where people wore costumes and lit bonfires to ward off ghosts of the dead. Later on, a pope designated November 1 to be the day where the church remembered martyrs and saints. Over time, Halloween became a time for children to have harvest parties and dress up in costumes to go trick or treating. Halloween is what you make of it, to tell you the truth. Even adults have parties to be like children again and just relax and have some fun. In the end, does it really even matter?</span></div>
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<span style="color: #b45f06;"> I worked 9 hours today, and when I got off work, I thoroughly enjoyed taking my children out to get some candy. Charity was a lady bug and JW was a ninja. They both had changed their minds multiple times before today, and in the end, we decided to let them just wear what they wore last year since it still fit. It was fun going up to houses where people had been creative and created a little Halloween world with lights, smoke and scary images. Towards the end, we went up to a house where a child about Charity's height was dressed like SCREAM. Charity turned as white as a ghost because there was this person standing and shaking his head at her. She screamed and he started following her down the sidewalk. (I was there...don't' worry :) She hollered out, and when he laughed, she stomped her foot and stuck her tongue at him. That was my favorite memory of the evening. </span></div>
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<span style="color: #b45f06;"> We came home, ate pizza, and watch THE GREAT PUMPKIN CHARLIE BROWN. A night full of memories for sure....one that will forever stick in our children's mind....I'm so happy to be making great memories with them.</span></div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-17645051842545165522013-10-23T23:13:00.003-04:002013-10-23T23:13:58.634-04:00She Didn't Have a Face<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaeaklZuiUxBH9zlbw80GpW6hfuizXTkvoAWPB9uIocY5p8lHToAQUCPLDDhmUvaHHCdA0Fl485HOI2e4vashqfxxByP0_Otu-WG6AXM3uOrwB1ktaQMHN34Z5c5qVwlsmVJXs9bFUqcUn/s1600/ravengirl.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgaeaklZuiUxBH9zlbw80GpW6hfuizXTkvoAWPB9uIocY5p8lHToAQUCPLDDhmUvaHHCdA0Fl485HOI2e4vashqfxxByP0_Otu-WG6AXM3uOrwB1ktaQMHN34Z5c5qVwlsmVJXs9bFUqcUn/s320/ravengirl.jpg" /></a></div>
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<strong><em><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">For you never knew her name.....</span></em></strong></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">The way she moved, the way her presence drifted through the rafters</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">The way she was, yet never was...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">The way she existed yet sank beneath the tumultuous waves</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Clinging to the hope that someone would hear her screams</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Struggling to breathe in this world that channeled her energy</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Into a windmill of tepid darkness</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">And ransacked even the whitest of evil</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">If evil could ever be still long enough to drag the next victim...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">No one ever knew who she was</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">No one ever saw her face</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">No one ever listened for her calls for help</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">And no one stood still long enough to understand</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">The very evil that ensued her footsteps</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">How she tried to tell the truth of who she was</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Yet remembered that smirks lay not far from where she stood</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Darkness...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Shadows...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Eeriness...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Falling...</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Don't walk away from what you don't understand</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Don't hide from something that scares you and makes your heart jump</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Don't pretend you never knew she existed</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Don't underestimate the power you hold within your grasp</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">The very power to make or break the darkest spell</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">That threatens to place a choke-hold on the nearest being....</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;"></span></em> </div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">She escaped from this asylum of guilt and pain</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">Shackled by the laughter and empty words</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">She found a way to let the world know she never existed</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">The way they mocked her to tears</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">That flowed like acid rain down her marble face</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">It's as if she never was....</span></em></div>
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Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-67966502832184003672013-10-19T01:08:00.001-04:002013-10-19T01:08:18.555-04:00Girl Meets World<div style="text-align: center;">
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<span style="font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"> For as long as I can remember, I have been able to go to a magical place where all of my dreams come true. Long before I had a sister and a brother, I became very good at playing well alone. I have always had a vivid imagination, and the truth of the matter is, that was the beginning of my life as a writer, and continues even to this day. Whenever something was a little "off" in my world, I was able to sit and day-dream, and I even carried a little notebook with me so that I was able to write down my feelings on the matter. As I became older, my mom took note that whenever I would spend hours on the piano, I was hurting inside. Music also became my "magical world." I believe that writing and music go hand-in-hand, and that they both have a healing power. Words can heal, and they can also destroy. The same is with music...it can heal a broken heart or it can cause the anger that is built up inside, to implode into a disaster. The following is a poem about the magical world of writing and poetry and how they tie together.</span></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">I grew up where the sun shone through my yellow curtains</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">And made me feel like my life was brand-new</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">I'd stare out across the royal plushness of my backyard</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">And dream of places that existed beyond the green carpet</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Places that could take you where great people once lived</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">I could hear the music whistling through the silky evergreens</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">I could close my eyes and smell the mustiness of the autumn leaves</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Hear the fast-approaching trains that rumbled near my window</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Rattling the antique glass and making me feel safe and sound</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Music wafted through the vents with the toastiness of the warmth</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Listening to hours of practice and beautiful melodies from my sister</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">I can smell the mouth-watering baking for the holidays</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">As I'd crack open a hard-backed book</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Ready to meet a new person and become fast friends</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Flashlights glowing under the bed-covers</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Headphones worn to drown out the world around me</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">I could lay on my back against the smoothed concrete</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Of the expansive white-washed gazebo</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">And listen to the birds sing their many melodies</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">From the wooded trails not far from my being</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">I could harmonize completely with my family</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Relishing the fact that our voices blended as one</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">And knowing that that moment would but vanish</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">From my out-stretched grasp....</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Oh, I can always leave my current work-filled day</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">And travel back in time, to meet many beautiful, old friends</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Acquaint myself with new ones and never see their faces with my eyes</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">For to imagine is the best skill a writer can possess</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">To see the world from up above, looking down</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Hovering over them like an angel of light</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">They make their way through the looking glass and into your pen</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">Singing the songs, whether good or bad</span></em></div>
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<em><span style="font-family: Arial;">And creating a memory that was once upon a time....</span></em></div>
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Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-76303393387693895962013-10-15T16:46:00.001-04:002013-10-15T16:46:23.956-04:00Within These Walls<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
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Behind every poem lies a story, a memory, a piece of one's life. For years, I allowed myself to hide in the shadows and observe those around me. I have been known as quiet and a girl of few words, but in reality, I have much to say. If you pay attention, you will find most of what I have to say within my writings. This particular poem is written from the view point of moving on from hurts and pain from the past. I had a great childhood, but I allowed those in my life to tell me how I should be and how my personality really was. It wasn't until these past few years, that I figured out who I really was without the words and pictures others had painted about me. I have learned much about myself, but the main thing is that I have a heart of mercy. Where others tore me down, I build those in my life up. Like the song, <em>You Raise Me Up,</em> I decided one day to truly invest in those around me and build them up in their daily lives.</div>
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<em>Within these walls I hide behind what you have to say</em></div>
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<em>Never standing forward, never speaking up</em></div>
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<em>I allowed you to say what you had to say</em></div>
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<em>And I rarely had any words with which to reply</em></div>
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<em>For I kept them all buried deep inside</em></div>
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<em>And never a word did I speak in your presence</em></div>
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<em>All of the pain you have caused</em></div>
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<em>All of the uproar within your domain</em></div>
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<em>I stood back and allowed myself to be silent</em></div>
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<em>I step forward now, not to yell or even cry</em></div>
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<em>But to say that I forgive you.</em></div>
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<em>I forgive you for all of your judgments</em></div>
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<em>I forgive you for not understanding the way of life</em></div>
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<em>To not know what I know today, to walk in total darkness</em></div>
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<em>I forgive you for not understanding what it is to walk in love</em></div>
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<em>To put others before your very self</em></div>
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<em>I bow within the pain that you possess</em></div>
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<em>That you don't know how to reach out your hand with mercy</em></div>
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<em>To forgive as Christ forgave us</em></div>
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<em>I bow in prayer that one day, you too will be set free...</em></div>
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<em>Free from this burden that weighs your body down</em></div>
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<em>That darkens the way of those who are lost</em></div>
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<em>That you will see the light that He possesses</em></div>
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<em>And you will feel His grace, far beyond comprehension.</em></div>
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<em>I forgive you for you are standing in the dark</em></div>
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<em>And you need someone to light your path.</em></div>
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<em>I close my eyes in prayer for you</em></div>
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<em>That you will understand no condemnation</em></div>
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<em>And you will stand in freedom, in grace, in light, in peace.</em></div>
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<em>I am not better than you by any means</em></div>
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<em>For we all stand equal at the foot of the cross...</em></div>
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<em>I reach out my hand and offer forgiveness, restoration, freedom.</em></div>
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Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-21233902073189318922013-10-02T21:02:00.001-04:002013-10-02T21:02:27.386-04:00Through the Looking Glass<div style="text-align: center;">
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">She
discovered that the path she had been travelling<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Would
no longer be a safe way home<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Shards
of glass threatened to pierce her through the heart<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And
pieces of what appeared to be a golden frame<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Lay
stagnant in the muck and the mire of the desolate road<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">She
clutched what was left of the tattered pieces of clothing that surrounded her<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And
braced herself for a brighter tomorrow filled with promises of hope<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Her
ashen face was painted with the grime and filth from her travels<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And
her tiny hands shook as she decided to move forward…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Step
by step, one foot in front of the other, she walked<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Faintly,
at first, with blood and tears that streamed down her soiled image<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Those
who could help, walked idly by, some laughed and some whispered<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">“Desolate
creature,” they called her, one who walked boldly yet alone<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Not
one soul tried to see that she struggled because she carried herself with grace<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
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<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Though
outwardly, she appeared to be shaken by a heightened battle<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Inwardly
was a strength that could be seen deep within the eyes of her soul….<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Stepping
forward, turning from the mockers and those who would jeer,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">She
began to pick up the pieces of the glass…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">In
them, she could see her reflection and with each piece, there was a flash<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Of
a distant memory that threatened to kill her spirit.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">She
continued to piece these jagged shards until they, together formed an image…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">With
a gasp, she peered into her reflection and what she saw nearly took her breath
away…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">A
lone tear fell from her eyes and the glass became like new<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Standing
in front of herself, she took one step forward, into her future.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">You
see, the pieces that threatened to kill her were what brought her to her future…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">She
walked through the looking glass, brand new, whole, revived,<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">And
those who saw her, those who laughed and mocked, bowed in awe at the beauty
that lay before them<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">The
true beauty that always was seen within the recesses of her soul<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Verdana","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">But
now shone through her like a ray of light.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
</div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-70343596968226499822013-09-27T09:19:00.002-04:002013-09-27T09:20:41.220-04:00Who I Am Inside <span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> One thing I have learned over the course of the last several months, is that all of humanity is different, yet in some ways, we are the same. I happen to be the more intense type, taking most everything seriously. This side of me is there for a reason...I am an artist. I have learned to embrace what I would call my flaws and make them my strengths. It is within this side that I have hated for years, that I found the place where I could truly be myself through my writings along with the love that I possess for those around me.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I also am always looking for answers. Most of the questions that I ask, people scratch their heads wondering who would think or ask such a thing. I have long gotten over being self-conscience because I have learned that if you never ask, you will never know. I remember as a small child asking a question in Sunday school only to be told that I ask too many questions, and for heaven's sake, please put my hand down. I'm sure I was continually interrupting the lesson with my questions, and if I would've just listened, my question would be answered. But my mind had a way of jumping ahead, and seeing the future and planning and trying to understand everything there is to understand about a subject. Even to this very day I ask questions that no one can answer.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Either way you look at it, I always felt different than everyone around me. I used to think there was something terribly wrong with me because I wouldn't grasp humor quite as fast, or it took me a little longer to catch onto something new. Truth be told, I wouldn't change any of the above about myself because it has made me a better person all around. Because I am sensitive, I can relate what it feels like to someone else if they are hurt. Because I am aware when something isn't understood in my mind, I am more apt to be patient with another soul who becomes confused along the way. Because I am inquisitive, I am most likely very happy to answer as many questions that are asked of me. All of these things that I loathed for so long, that set me apart, are now my ally. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I know what it feels like to be misunderstood. I understand the child who feels bullied or the girl who feels betrayed. I sense when something is amiss. Most of the time, I can tell when something is wrong and the other person pretends that it's not. I have the ability to see beyond the words and fake smiles. The "everything is GREAT" that becomes overkill to the world behind the mask of someone struggling deep inside is rarely ever missed by my observations. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I want to end by sharing something that greatly helped me open my eyes just this past weekend. I was sitting there in my pew at church and listening intently, when several points were given on how to treat others. I always thought that I knew how to treat other people because of where I had been in life with the people who mistreated me and my family. I actually thought that I was the best friend anyone could ever have! How prideful we become when we actually have the audacity to think that we have arrived in an area! It's human nature to stand in pride once in a while, but pride sure does have a way of being very painful when it falls. We should always be striving to be a better person, a better friend. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> The following points just opened my eyes a tad wider to the needs of those around me whether it be: the struggling author, the hopeful businessman, the scared little girl, the angry driver, the hyper child, the scarce secretary, the distant authority figure. The list can go on and on. In the end, we don't always know what makes the other person "tick." We might think we know someone, but half of the time, most everyone is putting on a show. It might take a little to get to the real person inside. There is always a reason why someone does things the way they do or why they see something a little differently than you. <em>Be kind to everybody because everybody is having a tough time.</em></span><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"></span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;">1.) Give the other person the benefit of the doubt.</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">2.) Assume the best, not the worst.</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">3.) Remember, you only heard one side of the story. There are ALWAYS two sides to every story.</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">4.) Even if you SAW it yourself, remember, you only saw ONE view point.</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">5.) Don't take it personally.</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">6.) Even when the other person is having a bad moment, it's our job to absorb each other's bad moments.</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana;">7.) Love and help the needy person, regardless of where they fit in.</span></em>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-59938748902176203662013-08-28T23:16:00.001-04:002013-08-28T23:44:30.178-04:00The Lost River, Found<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia, "Times New Roman", serif; font-size: large;"> <em>Winding roads snake through mountainous rock</em></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Overlooking a sparkling ribbon of blue</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Leaves are changing, falling downward</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Windows down, the breeze assaults ones' senses</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Bringing a feeling of blissful nostalgia</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">A reminder that there is still resilient beauty still remaining</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">The crackle of a roaring fire</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Hoists ones' senses into a sort of haze</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Blinking, bowing ones' head in silence</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Heart beats fast and breath erodes sporadically</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;"><span dir="auto"><span style="font-family: Times New Roman;">Déjà vu </span></span><em>resonates into the wilderness</em></span></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Bringing into mind the field of wildflowers</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">The sounds of howling coyote or perhaps a hunting dog</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Off in the distance, echoing through the stillness</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Running freely with great abandon</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Never looking back on what was</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Only looking ever forward towards the tree line</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Singing at the top of ones' lungs </span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Not a single care in the world</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Simple bystanders raise their brows in wonder</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Calling out to see if all is well</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">One doesn't feel the need to explain this state of pure ecstasy</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Because knowing that this is real life</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Understanding that this memory will last a lifetime</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<em><span style="font-family: Georgia; font-size: large;">Is all that really matters down at the lost river, found.</span></em></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
</div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-29638458881404005552013-07-20T22:09:00.002-04:002013-07-20T22:09:50.101-04:00Can We Go Back?<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Simple everyday living is often taken for granted. I have learned over the past couple of days that living in the moment, focusing on what's the most important, is what really matters. Sometimes we go too far one way, and it's just too much. It's almost like we set a goal that is so far out of reach that it's ridiculous and impossible. Then the mind shuts down, and everything we had hoped to accomplish is tossed aside. It's like we forget that for one moment in our life we had this dream, this spark, this desire to even set this goal. We forget how we felt at that moment. Sometimes, when I am in that exact moment, I want to just pick up a controller and push pause...then rewind just a tad, and feel that way over and over. Or, I want to take a canning jar and scoop it all inside and seal it tightly so I can feel that way whenever I want to...whenever I feel as if my world is spinning and I'm in a whirlwind. But, alas, this is what we call life. We can't go back in time, and we can't go forward. What really matters is the here and now. What counts is this moment, this time that you are currently standing in...I can get in my car and go to a farmer's market and breathe in the sweet smells of the countryside, and open my eyes wide and take in all of the beauty of the fruits, vegetables and flowers....gaze out over the fields of apple trees and watch the cows as they graze in the pasture. I can pull up instagram with my phone and take pictures of my children swinging and being goofy. I can record their laugh as they just about laugh at everything I do. Or, take for instance, a few nights ago, I decided to take a sunset walk with my Charity. As she held my hand and just talked to me, it was the most precious memory I've ever made. She is growing up so fast, and it's kinda scary. I'm taking a hold of every single moment, those little things become big memories later on in life. The very fact that my JW will take his blanket, wrap it around himself and roll around on the floor when he is out and out bored, is hilarious to me. I usually pick him up and tickle him or have him sit next to me as I hold him close. He's my cuddle bug, and I treasure that. It's the arguing about the best way to make bbq chicken as Josh and I cook together, then the hugs by the kitchen sink, the kisses by the stove. Or how I will be inspired about a spot in my book, and sit down and type as fast as I can between oven timers and stove alarms. Can we go back in time? No, and we can't go forward either....but we can live in the moment.</span>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-33844199158127382972013-07-16T14:55:00.000-04:002013-07-16T14:55:19.009-04:00Of Coffee and Post Stamps...<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif;"> Have you ever had one of those days where it's probably better to lock yourself in a room away from everyone and anyone? Sure! We've all been there, including myself. Or, the possibility, you could maybe, just maybe climb into bed, pull the covers over your head, close your eyes and wake up on the "flip-side" could be another one of those days. What do we do when these days happen? Do we give in to these emotions, blaming this or that? Do we yell at the post-man or scream at the Dunkin Donuts barista? My years of experience tell me that this isn't the way to handle life. It's best to just ignore those feelings, tell yourself it's going to be ok, smile and talk sweetly. As much as we want to give attitude or really tell that person what we are thinking, in the end, when your mind is clear and those feelings are gone, things will be worse and feelings will be hurt. I have learned that it's better to not say anything if my words are going to hurt someone. It's better not to throw salt on someones wounds, and it's better to think everything through before responding in any given situation. Have I perfected this? No, but I do believe that I am getting better and better every single day. It's alright if you when you get home, away from everyone, to have a really good cry. Crying has a way of cleansing the soul and healing emotion. As a writer/artist, emotions do seem to be more magnified. If you are an artist of any kind, you know exactly what I am saying. You know that the creative side of your personality has a way of allowing you to feel and see everything a little differently than the rest of the world. Learning to work with your personality, and learning to control yourself is a must. Not everyone gets that. Not everyone can see or understand when you are having a melt-down. Some of us have a gift...a gift that enhances our ability to get and understand how others are feeling. Sometimes we have a way of reading between the lines or understanding what is going on with another person without them having to say anything.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana;"> So, to wrap things up, why don't we purpose to take control of our emotions, to allow ourselves to feel, but to keep them in check and take care of them at the appropriate time. No, it's not fair to holler at the mail-man or pound our fist on the counter at our favorite coffee shop because the first sip you take is one of solid sugar. :-) I'm smiling as I write this because being human can be hilarious when you think about it! Allow yourself to be human, but learn from your mistakes and move on with your everyday living. Chow!</span>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-47791544143880534602013-07-07T23:33:00.001-04:002013-07-07T23:33:14.696-04:00Sweet Wild Rose
<br />
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Her bite is bittersweet, cutting down
one’s pride yet soothing one’s soul<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Her touch is effervescent, relieving
one’s inner wounds and healing one’s fear<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">How I long to sweep her off her feet,
how I desire to make her mine<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">How I treasure every single minute, hold
close every single word spoken<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">How I close my eyes and imagine the life
we would share on this earth<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Walking hand in hand, sharing our
innermost thoughts and feelings<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">How I lay back and I see what we could
be, the best of friends<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Though many would mock me to scorn and
say I’m truly gone mad<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Though it would be an outrage, a
disaster in the making<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I simply cannot care, for to lose her
would be to lose a piece of my heart…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">That piece that is most vital to my
mortality, that part that is needed to keep me alive<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I must not let go of this sweet soul,
sent my way for this very purpose<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I must pull her out of her field of
wildflowers, for she stands out among them all, my sweet wild rose.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<br />
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;"></span></i>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-62641134025708285142013-06-06T23:56:00.002-04:002013-06-06T23:56:17.717-04:00Far Away
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
can feel you ever so close, your presence is real, your very essence<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
close my eyes and breathe, like a brush of an angel’s wing across my face<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Finger-tips
brush my own, the faint scent of your perfume<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Tears
roll down my face, I clasp my hands in front of me and embrace this moment<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">A
moment that comes and goes, a moment that is but too brief<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
know you are there, I can feel you…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
can’t see you, but my spirit feels yours, so close, yet so far away<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
raise my hand and touch your invisible one<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
hear your voice inside my head, I see your smile, your laughter, your love<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
open my eyes and then you are gone….running after you, come back to me<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Don’t
go away, I need you here beside me, I need to know you will stay<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Chasing
a mirage, sinking to the ground in desperation, a spiral of smoke and you are
gone<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
can’t see you, I can’t feel you, I can’t find you….where did you go?<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">It’s
like you are hidden, far away, never to return, gone, gone, gone….<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">I
can’t hear you anymore, your voice is but a whisper, your scent but a distant
memory<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">Hidden
from this world, far away in another world…gone until the time is right…<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">My
human mind can’t understand this, my brain is but a fog, my memory but a vapor<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;">All
I feel is the love you left behind, placed in those near to me.<o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; tab-stops: 291.0pt;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;"><span style="mso-tab-count: 1;"> </span><o:p></o:p></span></i></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<i style="mso-bidi-font-style: normal;"><span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 16pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></i></div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-81881896175140411812013-05-12T17:22:00.001-04:002013-05-12T17:22:13.004-04:00Domino Effect<em><span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">The day it all came crashing down all around me</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I knew all along what was going on</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">But I tried to believe it wasn't true,</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">That you would be the one person I could trust</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">That you were different somehow...</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I felt a connection but kept you at bay</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I was slowly letting go, believing you were real</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">Then it was over...you revealed who you really were</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">It hurts me to think I ever trusted you</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">It breaks my very soul that I looked up to you...</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">Once upon a time, not very long ago,</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I thought you were real, my ice was thawing....</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">How could you disappoint me so?</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I thought this was different...then it started</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">The first hit was harsh, then when it finally hit me</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I looked up and saw where I had gone wrong...</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">It started at the top and rolled on down</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">So hard, then it piled up....I came up for air....</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">This is so typical...harsh, cruel world....domino effect.</span></em>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-74376623226841649622013-04-29T11:16:00.001-04:002013-04-29T11:16:24.018-04:00Déjà Vu
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">A
torrent of voices heard across the still brook<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Ripples
of water flowing over the pebbles and broken rocks<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">A
myriad of birds singing their daily news<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Beams
of sunlight warm the boulder upon which I rest<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
look out over the mountain-tops and down to the valley below me<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
see the streams of water, the fallen leaves upon the ground<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
close my eyes and breathe in the warmth of the sun, the smell of earth<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">My
hands run across the ruggedness of the rock, feeling every crevice and ridge<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I’ve
been here before but maybe in another life-time<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
recall the feeling, the wonder of it all, and I’m not afraid.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Maybe
I was scared before, of the height, the depth, the existence,<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">But
now, fear is my enemy, warmth and peace take its spot.<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Leaning
back, I look up at the clouds and smile as the breeze rustles through my hair…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">I
know this feeling, it’s not an illusion… it’s a miracle taken place, a dream
come true<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">Gazing
again at what lay ahead, I understand what the mystery entailed, history was
written…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;">In
this very spot, hundreds of years before and I lived it….déjà vu…<o:p></o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
<br />
<div align="center" class="MsoNormal" style="margin: 0in 0in 10pt; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "Arial","sans-serif"; font-size: 14pt; line-height: 115%;"><o:p> </o:p></span></div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-50508576415770597532013-04-25T21:13:00.003-04:002013-04-25T21:13:33.711-04:00This is ME<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"> My name is Elizabeth Hamm....I am me...I am a writer, a muser, a thinker, an author. My words flow like the sea...my words cease from being. At times they fly like the wind....other times, they are frozen like the tundra. I am a lover, loyal, free, strong and random....I won't fight unless it's for someone I love or what I believe in with my whole heart. I hate angry words. I hate sinister conversations. I despise confrontation. If I feel like I'm being threatened, I shut down like an electric generator on empty. If I don't know how to respond, I am silent. If I know you are irritated or upset, I feel this sudden need to make sure you are calm and feeling better. If you are crying, I am a shoulder to lean on. I never feel it's the wrong time to cry. I never see you as a failure just because you make a mistake. I am my biggest critic, and I'm sure I punish myself more than you ever could. I have this need to help the broken, to fix the lost, to restore the out of service. I listen with everything I have, and you have no doubt I care. I explain myself over and over until you begin to think I am apologizing, but in reality, I am just trying to convey what I'm thinking. I am silent....I am shy. In social gatherings, I listen, observe, smile, stand still. I have the ability to be adventurous and random, to laugh until I am crying and to make everyone around me laugh with the same fervor. I am goal-oriented, but sometimes I become side-tracked. I will get back on track if motivated, and often-times, I am self-motivated. I write poetry at random times and share them with my best friend until I'm sure she is rolling her eyes like, "Another one, Liz?" (just kidding!) I imagine what life would be like if I made certain decisions, and that I make those things happen. I used to sit still...for a while I was stagnant. I was afraid to move for fear everything would fall apart, but in doing so, I was slowly drifting away. I may be the quietest one in the room, but in reality, I know I probably have the most to say. I would have to say that I am romantic at heart, and that with time, that hasn't changed. Each and every day that I am married to the greatest man on earth, I thank my God for bringing him to me. He has patience and understanding and a sense of humor not many can forget. He is my other half, and I am sure we have many adventures ahead of us. My kids make me proud...my daughter is the greatest gift of a girl God could have ever given me. She has shown me what it means to love. Her smile and her heart are convicting. My son is the brightest boy with the biggest eyes and a heart to match. He challenges me and the most like me, it's scary. I am who I am, but I am a work in progress...a canvass not completed. If I have ever loved you, I will always love you. If I ever was your friend, I will be your friend until the end. I am ME.</span>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-21139510662172659942013-04-06T00:53:00.001-04:002013-04-06T00:53:32.227-04:00Never Have to Say Good-bye<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> This earth is just a temporary place</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Where we live and love and laugh</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You lived here with such a grace</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> So loved until your final breath...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You suffered heart-ache, found love and joy</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Through life, you travelled far</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> All with a smile that radiated light</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Your presence, we all adored...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You fought a good fight, you finished your race</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You kept on loving God</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> The peace you had, with others, you shared</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> We are thankful on this earth, you trod...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> We never have to say good-bye</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> For you've reached the other shore</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Our tears are just temporary ones</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> We love you forever more...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You're walking streets of gold up there</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You've seen our Saviour's face</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Your loved ones who have gone before</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You've seen, their pain erased...</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> We'll see you later, over there</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Our work down here's not done</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> We'll miss you sorely, your precious smile,</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Your new life has just begun.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">*written for Grandma Ruth R. Garten, gone on to her new home, 3/28/13</span></em>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-28855171261367678892013-03-23T09:36:00.002-04:002013-03-23T09:36:45.287-04:00On Friendships and LOVE <span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;">Sometimes I can't let go of certain things. I have struggled with rejection and not being good enough. The "great deceiver" has made sure of that, and I have not realized it until recently. I never understood why I always kept a "kungfu" grip on things such as relationships. It all started when we first moved away when I was 10 years old. When we moved back to my childhood home, my friends from birth were different, as was I. I was able to pick up where we left off, but they weren't. They didn't want me as a part of "their group." It hurt me to my core because I was among a small group of people. Without them, I had NO ONE. While we lived away, I was able to become friends with my family. Throughout my teen years, I had mediocre friendships. There was alot of turmoil within them because as they pointed out to me later in life, they were terribly jealous of me. I had them turning on me like a pit-bull always trying to either get me in trouble or keep others away from me, "shunning me" in the process. I was able to put off an "aura" of confidence and they were jealous of that. They hated the fact that I wouldn't back down either. I fought for right, and I defended those who were misunderstood. I confronted most of them, and didn't use tact in telling them what they were doing and how they needed to stop. Looking back, I was fighting fire with fire and not water. It was a losing battle. If I had just learned to let go early on and walked in love, the turmoil would've eventually ceased. When I think back to that "era" in my life, I find it necessary to write about, not only for me and my healing process, but also for some of you who are reading this. Maybe you will find a peace much earlier in life than I did.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"> It wasn't until I went away to college that I found true friendship. People who loved me for me and put no stipulations on me. They didn't care about my life, past or how I was. I was still pretty messed up relationship-wise, but I had one undying characteristic, I was loyal and I loved deeply. When I say I had a hard time with friendships, I mean just that. I didn't know how to be a friend to someone. I was always worried they would soon reject me as well. That soon, I wouldn't be good enough for them. That I wouldn't fit it with their "group." I soon found out that I was wrong. Looking back, I made some amazing friendships. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"> Oh, yes, I had some who became jealous of me and my boyfriend. I had some who felt the need to spread nasty rumors about me...some who felt the need to corner me in the bathroom and threaten my life. Those were dark days. Those were days where I wondered what was wrong with me. I wondered why these people turned on me like pit-bulls. I had loved them with all of my heart, and I had done nothing to them. Yes, I retaliated some when I was attacked. No, I didn't walk in love because I didn't know how and hadn't learned that concept. Yes, I chased a girl down and told her to stop the rumors because she didn't know what she was talking about. No, I wasn't very "Christ-like" in doing so. I turned people in for destroying my belongings, for stealing my stuff, for using my phone minutes and jacking my phone bill through the roof, etc. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: "Trebuchet MS", sans-serif; font-size: large;"> But I also had the type of friendships that will stay with me through eternity. I had loyal friends who loved me and we understood each other. I didn't have to hide myself from them. Looking back, I see that the ones who were constantly trying to hurt me were never truly my friends. They were mere acquaintances. Hind-sight tells me that I had alot to learn.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;"> Years later, I haven't made a massive amount of friendships, but the ones I have made have either phased out or remained strong. I found good people who didn't grow up like I did who still was able to love me for me and all of the mess that surrounded me. I found that it was okay to become friends with all kinds of people, young and old. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;"> I've had a very good friend of mine pass away three years ago. I called her "Grandma Mae." I loved her very much, and we became best friends. I remember when I received the news that she passed on. I fell to my knees in disbelief. She had told me the Sunday previously that she was "ready to go Home." I just laughed and told her she was silly and she had many years left. I still remember how she smiled and patted my hands, knowingly.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;"> Since then, I made a few more friendships that are amazing and fulfilling. I don't have to hide myself, and I know they we love each other unconditionally. One of those friendships, I refer to as my "Anne of Green Gables friendship." We are "bosom friends." We get each other. We have fought like sisters and moved on. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;"> More recently, I re-connected with someone I knew in college, and we have found a connection. We wish we lived closer to each other, but as life has it, we don't. We have gone through a similar experience in life, and we understand the repercussions from it.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Trebuchet MS; font-size: large;"> All of this to come to my final conclusion. Some friendships have to come to an end, for now. I don't really believe in "ending a friendship." I'm sorry if you disagree, for you see, I can never stop loving a person even when they are long gone. They may say the meanest things to me, but in the end, I love them. I am hurt, yes, but I love them all the same. Why? I have a gift of seeing past all of that hurt and mean words. I can see the good...I can remember the good times. I treasure the memories with them. I have to walk away....for now. Yes, I have been told, "Stop contacting me." I respect that. I will stop contacting you, but I will never stop loving you. I have been told, "I pray that you will find and understand the error of your ways." Yes, I will find and understand them because slowly but surely, my eyes are being opened to TRUTH. It isn't what they mean when they say that to me, but in reality, my life isn't their journey. I will always love them, but I have to walk away for now, loving them, caring about them, and yes, maybe one day we can re-connect. Who knows what the future holds. All I know is that I will never let go of being loyal and yes, walking that LOVE walk.</span>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-43781211387039798072013-03-18T10:51:00.000-04:002013-03-18T10:51:27.896-04:00Bless the Lord<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> I will have to say that quite a bit has been thrown my way within the last 10 years of my life. I can actually keep going back farther than that, but to be honest, most of the trials in my life started as soon as I graduated from college and began living on my own. I have had many things happen to where I could've chosen to turn my back on God. There were very dark moments when I was angry with Him and blamed Him for everything. It was then that I truly didn't know God very well but knew only what I had been taught, that He was this "big scary being that we dare not cross least he kill us." That is silly in hind-sight, but if you grew up like me, you will understand completely what I am saying. I would walk around in fear all of the time. I cared too much what others thought of me, and that ran into caring what God thought. But I hadn't really learned to think for myself, and I hadn't really read what God's Word said about God, how He is a just God, slow to anger and generous in mercy. Oh, yes, I did read it but I believed what someone told me rather than taking God at His Word.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Through these past 10 years, I have been on a true spiritual journey, and this journey continues with great force even as I write this. I have found that I can now get over a "curve-ball" in life far faster than I have in the past. I can quickly seek out the good in a situation at a much greater pace than before. Just this weekend, I had to be reminded that forgiveness isn't all about the person but for me. Yes, it is right to apologize when you have wronged someone. Yes, it is very right to forgive a person who has done you wrong, but the truth of the matter is, they don't need my forgiveness....I need to forgive for my own spirit. To hold onto something for so long truly dampens your spirit and stops all growth. Soon you are stagnant and oppressed and it spills over into other areas of your life. I know because I have been down that road. I have lived in unforgiveness for years. It did me no good whatsoever. In turn, I wasn't hurting those people who had wronged me. They didn't even know I hadn't forgiven them! They weren't losing sleep or being harmed! I was harming myself and those around me with my negativity!</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Just this week, I was thrown a "curve-ball," and all I have to say on the matter is I worked through it, prayed and now am over it. Yes, it still "smarts" a little bit because of what it was. I can really sit here and tell you how sad I am that a certain dream of mine has been put on hold, but I choose to focus on the positive and give many reasons that this was "meant for good."</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I will end with the lyrics of one of my favorite songs:</span><br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
<span style="font-size: large;"><strong>Bless the Lord, O my soul<br />O my soul<br />Worship His holy name<br />Sing like never before<br />O my soul<br />I'll worship Your holy name<br /><br />The sun comes up, it's a new day dawning<br />It's time to sing Your song again<br />Whatever may pass, and whatever lies before me<br />Let me be singing when the evening comes</strong></span></div>
Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-77222617860051691062013-02-28T17:24:00.000-05:002013-02-28T17:24:16.111-05:00Alone<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> I sit here alone, deep in my thoughts</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">No one to enter, no one to exit</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Musings all my own</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">No one to listen, no one to see</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I'm in my own little bubble of my own making</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">No one to penetrate, no one to label</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> It's not attention or self-pity I need</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">It's not sympathy or words of care coming my way</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You shake your head as if you don't understand</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">You roll your eyes as if it's enough</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You can't pretend to really grab ahold</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">You don't see what I see, you don't feel what I feel</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You aren't inside my head</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">You aren't the face of one who dreads</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> The pity and helplessness all must paint</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">Have you forgotten that we are but dust?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Have you remembered we all sin and we lust?</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">We each place our shoes upon our own feet</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> And the paths that we travel, each other we meet</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">So, look down your noses and wrinkle your brow</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Your pity and nonchalance make me sad somehow</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">For you don't know a thing about loving someone</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> For if you did, half the battle would be won.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I sit here in silence, I sit here in alone</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> It's okay that I do this, my heart isn't stone</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I have much to muse and I have much to say</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> But the one thing I know is that it'll all be ok.</span>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-2972560259384512635.post-23061832709357222412013-02-27T13:36:00.001-05:002013-02-27T13:36:59.753-05:00Addiction<span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"> <strong>Addiction </strong>as defined by Webster's Merriam dictionary:<em> a</em><span style="font-family: Times New Roman; font-size: small;"><em> <span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;">compulsive need for and use of a habit-forming substance (as heroin, nicotine, or alcohol) characterized by tolerance and by well-defined psychological symptoms upon withdrawal; broadly<strong>:</strong> persistent compulsive use of a substance known by the user to be harmful</span></em> <span style="font-family: Verdana, sans-serif; font-size: large;"><em>. </em>Addiction is a not so famous topic of conversation, but in today's society, we have an onslaught of various addictions that all do not have to do with substance abuse. There are also psychological addictions as well as relationship addictions. To name a few: approval, fear,self-deprecation, wrong romance, etc. </span></span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> You may wonder what I might know about addiction. No, I am not addicted to drugs, narcotics, nicotine, or even alcohol. But I have seen what these things do to people. I have worked with several teenagers who were gripped in the claws of this evil monster. I have seen first-hand how hard they fought, and some didn't win. I've also experienced my own sets of addictions, but this isn't about my own little confession series. My focus is to point out a need to help. To be a person who is willing to be honest and talk about what is eating at most of the people that are in our every day lives.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I can't even begin to put a dent on this subject. It's very broad to say the least. I can try to describe what I see in my mind when I hear the word.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"></span><br />
<span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> <em>I walk into the room, palms sweaty,</em></span><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">Pulse racing, heart beating like a drum</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I reason within myself, it's ok</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">No one will know because I'm good</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Just this once won't hurt me, </span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">I mean, it's just ONE time, no pain...</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> He reaches his giant hand towards my throat</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">Wrapping his claws around it til I'm suffocating</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I can't breathe, my face turns red</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">Then purple, then blue, he lets go</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> But only for a brief moment...</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">In that moment, I find relief, I can breathe again</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Racing thoughts swirling, palpitations sounding</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">Words become a blurr, vision is lost</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I fall to my knees, beaten down, bloody and bruised</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">Each time becomes harder to get back up</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Anger boils over, denial takes over</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">In retrospect, I am the only one who can take control</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> I look up, tears streaming down my face</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;">This mighty monster will not win</span></em><br />
<em><span style="font-family: Verdana; font-size: large;"> Addiction is his name. </span></em>Stars Hollowhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/08135553622915249071noreply@blogger.com0