This and That

       Well, it seems like I don't get on here much to write, but this is one of the best things I can do....write. GROWL! I feel like I want to scream but there's no sound sometimes! I don't know why I have always wanted to work with troubled teens; then now I'm doing it and in no way are you really prepared as to how you will really really feel or respond. When you start something like this, you are putting your heart out there to be trampled over and over again; eventually, I believe that it will be scar-tissue and you won't feel anything anymore...at least, that's how I see it. I haven't worked with teen for about 5 years now when I taught school and the youth group....those kids did the same things to me then too...BUT my heart has always been to work with teens again, and this time, it's with kids with NO coping skill whatsoever....Don't get me wrong, I am in no way complaining....just venting the frustrations that I can't fully tell another soul and have them fully understand. And maybe in some way, I can walk away from my lap-top and forget that I have feelings. Maybe I will be able to say, "Mirror, mirror on the wall, please make me into a brick WALL!" I'm getting better, I suppose, but I've only been at this for a little over a month now. I've been saying that I want to make a difference in somebody's life, and now here's the chance.....Maybe, I will be honored to see some of the positive results in the distant future. Now, I know how to better train my own children to be model citizens and not end up like these kids. I can't help it....I love them whether they feel the same for me, it doesn't matter....I will be sad when they leave the program but also happy that they were able to complete it.
       On a different note, I am doing better with my work-out program. I met with my personal trainer today, and she encouraged me that I look like I'm getting into shape. She REALLY worked me out today as well! Balance exercises on a Bosu Ball looks easier than it really is! Let's just say that as I was doing these exercises, I was pleading, "MERCY!" in my mind. I'm NOT a wimp by any means, and I'm happy to say that my core is getting stronger and stronger every day. I feel muscles I didn't even know existed for the past  29 years of my life! I even strained a few in my upper back that I have to be careful with....but eh, it's all good. I am stronger than I ever thought I could be. Being strong physically will make you strong mentally as well. This is transforming me inside and out! I am happy to announce that I have lost 50 pounds! I have worked so hard for this! I still have a little ways to go, but I have gone far. For anyone who thinks they can't do it, you're wrong....once you have a breaking point, there will be no return for you....you have to have a breakthrough, a point where you realize that you are stronger than you think you are...a place where you know that you can do this and that you are worth doing it for.
       I have been following alot more sports lately; maybe it's because I am a football fanatic (GO STEELERS AND OSU!), but in all I love baseball, hockey, basketball, etc...oh, I'll even watch racing. I don't know...I was jazzed that the Pittsburgh Penguins won the other night! Now, I'm rooting for my Cleveland Cavs! Just thought I'd throw this paragraph in for all you sports' fanatics and haters! :)
       Life is good; I love my kids and hubby. I have great friends and family, but most of all, I love my GOD. Without Him, I am nothing but a piece of clay, dirt...He is my everything.