Falling Asleep

       Sinking back into the pillowy cloud of nothingness...staring blankly at the sky, quiet tears rolled down her face, burning into the memory of her heart. Nothing could erase all that she had done...nothing could ease the inner pain. No one could ever imagine the turmoil deep inside, for she only showed this weakness within the shadows. She had grown accustomed to burying any feeling she ever felt deep within...no love, no hate, no happiness, no pain would ever be shown to anyone, not even her closest friends. She couldn't allow any sign of weakness to taint what she had become. She wouldn't shed a tear for anyone to see. And, so she lay there within the darkness, all alone...nothing to keep her company except maybe her pillow. Her chest was burning and squeezing with this pain, so great that she wondered if she would ever see the light of day again. How long could she hold onto this facade? How long before she broke? Before these feelings came flooding and crashing her own made-up world? Could she ever really trust or allow anyone in? Could she really know who cared for her and who didn't? Could she ever allow herself to love with a love so deep, none of this would matter? She didn't know the answers to any of these questions....all she could do was lay there, quietly, and fall asleep...